Janet's Jargon

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Friday, August 24, 2012

Jumping on the bed?

Oh, when I was a kid, that was forbidden. But now I'm all grown up (and a whole lot more!) and in the past couple of weeks I wanted to jump on my bed. Instead, I felt like I was banging my head on the wall in a rubber room!

It all seemed so simple. I had made enough money between an editing job and some pretty good book sales to get myself a new mattress. The one I had was a used one that somebody found at a thrift shop for $5. It was ok. I mean, I can sleep on most anything at the drop of a hat and I never wake up with aches and pains. The biggest challenge was trying to claw my way out of the pit in the middle of it when I had to get up in the middle of the night and make a trip to the bathroom. (Another "bonus" of growing older.)

My search began online, as I live in the Boondocks and that is the easiest way to shop for bargains. I finally settled on an 11" pillowtop version from Sears. It was a terrific buy, with the regular price listed at $579 and it was on sale for $205. Of course there was a $76 delivery charge, but since it was coming all the way from Green Bay (about 75 miles to our south), I wasn't about to argue. I was sure it would be much better than the 3" one I had now.

The other alternative I found was at WalMart, but when I read the reviews that said something like, "I was surprised by how good it was, especially after seeing how small the package was that it arrived in." The price was about the same as the one from Sears, but I didn't want a "collapsible" mattress.

So, I made the order, gave them the information so they could get their money, and checked the box for the soonest delivery date possible: Wed., Aug. 15th. Seemed simple enough.

Let me back up a bit. When we lived in Grand Forks ND, where there was a big Sears store just a few miles from us, we bought a number of things there. We never had any trouble. That was before Sears was bought out by K Mart. I guess that should have been my first clue that things aren't quite what they used to be. I never could figure out how one year K Mart announced that they were filing for bankruptcy and the next year they bought out Sears, one of the oldest, most reliable businesses in the United States. As a kid, I spent hours drooling over the Sears Wish Book at Christmas time. Many of my shoes and things for school came from the big Sears catalog. The catalog provided some good dreaming when I would sit in the outhouse, hoping no spiders, mice, chipmunks or squirrels invaded my privacy.

Everything seemed fine when I got a call on Tues. evening, Aug. 14th, informing me that my mattress would be delivered the following day, sometime between 4 and 6 p.m. When two men from our church stopped by on Wed. morning and offered to take my old mattress out and set it outside to make it easier for Sears to get the new one in place, I was pleased. When my neighbor from over the road and through the woods picked it up and hauled it to the dump for me, I was delighted. When I got a call from Sears to tell me that they had run into "a few problems" and the shipment "of your fridge" would be delayed until around 7:30, I was puzzled, to say the least. I told the woman (who could hardly speak or understand English, and who said she was in India when I asked her where she was) that I had not ordered a fridge, but was waiting for my mattress, she checked and assured me that she found the correct order. OK, fine and dandy. That was, until I got a call from another woman (who also spoke and understood almost no English and who said she was in Malasia) said that "your dishwasher has been delayed because of trouble with the truck and might not be delivered until tomorrow," I told her that I had not ordered a dishwasher but was waiting for my mattress and that I had no bed to sleep on until the new mattress arrived. She checked and found the order for the mattress. She said she would have someone call me by 10 pm if it couldn't be delivered Wed. night. I waited until about 10:15 and found a phone number for Sears. I got a woman who wouldn't even tell me where she was, and she said that "your garbage disposal can't be delivered until next Wed., Aug. 22, because the truck only goes to your area once a week, on Wednesdays." I told her that was unacceptable and I again informed her that I had no bed to sleep on until the mattress got here.

After a lot of discussion (not too friendly), she finally said she would try to get the man from the sub-contracting delivery company to see if it could be delivered on Thursday, the next day. She got him, and I finally persuaded her to let me talk to him directly. He explained that the truck had broken down and if they could get it repaired in time to get it here on Thursday he would do his best to do so. Otherwise, it would have to wait until Monday. I explained to him too that I had no bed to sleep on until I got the new mattress. He was very polite and at least he was in Green Bay, Wisconsin. He even gave me his personal cell phone number so I wouldn't have to deal with "those other people."

Anyway, the delivery wasn't made until Monday, about 12:30. Meanwhile, I slept on the very hard love seat, which is too short, even for a 5'2" gal of my age. I didn't dare try to turn over unless I stood up and put the pillow at the other end and reversed directions. I survived.

When the two men delivered the new mattress, they asked if there was anything else I needed. I told them, "Yes, where are my fridge, dishwasher, and garbage disposal?" One of the men began going through his invoices and said, "I don't see an order for them." The other man said, "I know they aren't on the truck." I told them about the phone calls I had gotten from Sears. I ended by saying, "My house is pretty small. I don't really have room for them anyway." They left laughing like crazy.

Bottom line is that the mattress is wonderful, but it's the last time I'll buy anything from Sears, no matter how good a sale price they have on it.

Hope you all have sweet dreams tonight.


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